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How Did I Cope With Miscarriage?

And How I found an answer in Torah.

By Jelena Derosa

Miscarriages are such painful times in our lives, both for women and men. It can take such a long time to fully heal from. To anyone reading this who may have experienced a loss, you are not alone. I am so sorry for your loss and pray that you are on a path of true healing.

When my husband and I went to our 9 week sonogram, the doctors told us there was no heartbeat. We were in shock, denial and heartbroken. We wanted so badly for it to just be a nightmare. B'H for my loving husband and that we went through it all together.

Also, my group of wonderful women who I was able to speak to and many experienced the same tragedy so they understood what to say. I wanted so badly to know the religious perspective and my husband was able to find one!

A woman went to her Rabbi and asked “what happens to a baby when a miscarriage occurs?” His response:

“Every soul that comes into this world comes here with a very specific mission. When that mission is completed, the soul can leave. The holiest of souls need so little time here in this world that some never even make it outside the womb. Others only need their heart to beat once, others not even that.”

I thought WOW! What a beautiful, soothing way to look at this experience! It brought me so much healing to think of it as my baby being so holy that it couldn’t come to this sinful earth. What a gift to carry an angel, a holy being, even for a short time. G-d chose YOU! How special are we to have held such a precious neshama? (soul) I can now live in more peace to know this. This did not completely eliminate my mourning but allowed me to embrace every feeling that comes with this experience and be compassionate to myself. I allowed myself to feel all the emotions and then say okay let’s shift the focus to the beautiful reasoning behind this.

Never forget as hard as it may be sometimes:

G-d always has a reason and it's always for our good!

"Hashem is close to the brokenhearted and saves those
who are crushed in spirit."

Brought By Jelena Derosa


Jelena Derosa is a new blogger for the Noahide Academy. She has been an observant Noahide for 3 years and is in the process of conversion. She is married with 3 children and is always coming up with new ways to teach her children about being righteous Noahides. She is a stay at home mom who spends most of her time teaching her children Torah and proper character development. Aside from her children, she spends time blogging, and creating YouTube videos where she shares testimonies in hopes to help someone else learn and heal. She is also building her small business called "Modest Me." She tries to help secular women find G-d and discover the beauty of Modesty and live a modest lifestyle.


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36 views3 comments


I am very moved and inspired by this article post. Wow... You and your husband are very courageous for being willing to share this experience with us. It takes a lot of strength and courage to do that. I felt healing and inspiration reading this article and am thankful to HaShem for both of your faithfulness and strength in Him🙏❤

Jelena Derosa
Jelena Derosa
Dec 20, 2022
Replying to

Wow I am so happy to hear that it had that impact on you. That is why I wanted to post this experience, to help even one person. I truly believe our experiences in life are to help others heal. Hashem is always there for all of us and knows our pain. He wouldn’t give us anything we can’t handle! That brings comfort to know we will always get through anything!


Arnold Sleiffer
Arnold Sleiffer
Dec 20, 2022


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